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The Invisible Scoreboard
Read more: The Invisible ScoreboardYou’ve opened LinkedIn and, suddenly, your stomach drops to the pits of hell. Someone just raised 1M in funding.Someone just bought a second home.Someone just made partner before 30.Someone just moved abroad—cost of living low.Someone just launched something innovative, bold. And without meaning to, you start computing. Shouldn’t I be further by now?How old am…
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What Changed When I Stopped Trying to Be Disciplined
Read more: What Changed When I Stopped Trying to Be Disciplined“I’m just not a morning person.”“I’m bad at consistency.”“I’m not a reader.” These statements feel harmless. Honest, even. But, they quietly lock you into an identity that keeps your behavior stagnant. The problem isn’t that you don’t want better habits.The problem is that you’re trying to latch onto change instead of leveraging your environment to…
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You Can’t Be a Good Person and Racist at the Same Time
Read more: You Can’t Be a Good Person and Racist at the Same TimePeople who resist the label racist often do so not because they oppose injustice, but because it conflicts with how they see themselves. They tend to think of themselves as decent. Polite. Fair. People who love their families and treat others well in everyday life. So when racism enters the conversation, it feels like a…
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American Life: Living Under Someone Else’s Fear
Read more: American Life: Living Under Someone Else’s FearBefore anyone feels the urge to say, “Then go back to where you came from,” let me save you the trouble. After you. Let’s be clear. This country wasn’t discovered, and it certainly wasn’t settled through peace or consent. It was seized through violence and displacement—a history that still shapes how the disease of unease…
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A Different Approach for the Year Ahead
Read more: A Different Approach for the Year AheadHappy New Year!~ I hope you rested. I hope you reflected. I hope you closed 2025 with at least a little more clarity than you had going into it. Now… let’s get to business. This is usually the part where we talk about resets. Fresh starts. New versions of ourselves. And that’s fine—truly. There’s nothing…
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If He Switches Up Out of Nowhere, Read This
Read more: If He Switches Up Out of Nowhere, Read ThisOne day, he is attentive and engaged. The next, his energy feels different. His tone shifts. His interest feels inconsistent. You replay conversations, wondering if you said or did something wrong. Often, you did not. When a man is uncomfortable with a woman who is secure in herself, he may reach for behaviors that make…
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Shiny Object Syndrome: The Illusion of Choice and the Cost of Always Wanting More
Read more: Shiny Object Syndrome: The Illusion of Choice and the Cost of Always Wanting MoreThere’s a quiet epidemic running through modern relationships. Not a virus or a crisis of compatibility, but something far more subtle: the inability to appreciate what we already have. Shiny object syndrome (SOS) has convinced many people that there is always something better waiting just outside the frame of their current life. Someone hotter, richer,…
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Why Being an Epidemiologist Makes Dating… Complicated (In the Best Way)
Read more: Why Being an Epidemiologist Makes Dating… Complicated (In the Best Way)There are advantages to being an epidemiologist. For instance, the ability to detect subtle patterns, identify outliers, track trends over time, and forecast outcomes with unnerving accuracy. However, those same skills become a curse the moment they’re intermixed with dating. Most women are taught to trust their feelings. Epidemiologists are trained to trust the data.…
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Detroit’s Black Tech Saturdays (BTS): Where Innovation Meets Community
Read more: Detroit’s Black Tech Saturdays (BTS): Where Innovation Meets CommunityPhoto credit: Dr. Dawn Batts, originally published in the Michigan Chronicle. When I first sat in on a Black Tech Saturdays (BTS) event, there were maybe 20 of us in the room, each carrying our own questions, ideas, and quiet ambition. I was curious, but reserved, simply trying to take it all in. I didn’t…
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Diagnosing Racism: What Zohran Mamdani’s Victory Reveals About America’s Collective Disorder
Read more: Diagnosing Racism: What Zohran Mamdani’s Victory Reveals About America’s Collective DisorderIn the wake of Zohran Mamdani’s historic New York City mayoral victory, America was again reminded of its uneasy relationship with identity, power, and belonging. Mamdani, a Muslim of Ugandan-Indian heritage and democratic socialist, won on a platform rooted in affordability, public housing, and equity. Yet, much of the backlash he faced had little to…
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How Labels Can Dehumanize and Uphold Injustice
Read more: How Labels Can Dehumanize and Uphold InjusticeThroughout history, language has been used not only to describe, but to distort reality. It can make cruelty feel like order, exclusion sound like good policy, and violence appear like it’s necessary for progress. Labels turn people into abstractions, helping those in power stay distant from empathy and accountability when moral clarity threatens their status…
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Books That Help Quiet the Noise and Restore Confidence
Read more: Books That Help Quiet the Noise and Restore ConfidenceWe talk a lot about confidence: how to gain it, how to project it, how to hold onto it when life unravels. Yet, much of what we call confidence today is performative. It’s the curated kind, built for visibility rather than depth. Clout has quietly replaced character as the new currency of worth. It rewards…
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The Math Ain’t Mathing: Dumb Logic Some Women Use in Love
Read more: The Math Ain’t Mathing: Dumb Logic Some Women Use in LoveWomen have all, but mastered intuition, endurance, and emotional fluency, but when it comes to love, even the most self-aware among us can lose all sense of logic. We rationalize, overgive, and “maybe he just…” our way into emotional dead ends, often mistaking struggle for loyalty and confusion for depth. So, in the spirit of…
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Dumbest Male Logic Used in Relationships (Yes, We’re Doing This)
Read more: Dumbest Male Logic Used in Relationships (Yes, We’re Doing This)Let’s be fair: women have their foolish moments too. We’ve got our “girl math,” our “I can change him,” and our “he’ll grow into the man I see in my head” tendencies. We’ve all been there, rationalizing chaos in the name of love. But, that roast is coming later because today we’re unpacking the mental…
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When the Bear Family Speaks: The Story That Taught Us Not to Ask Why
Read more: When the Bear Family Speaks: The Story That Taught Us Not to Ask WhyWe’ve all grown up with Goldilocks and the Three Bears as a quaint bedtime story, a seemingly innocent girl with golden curls, guided by curiosity rather than conscience, who wanders into a home that isn’t hers, tasting, testing, and taking until she’s caught, then fleeing without consequence. Depending on the version, she either escapes into…
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No One Can Make You Settle
Read more: No One Can Make You SettleNot the person who seems perfect on paper.Not the family member who guilt-trips you in the name of love.Not the job that looks stable, but drains you before noon. One of life’s hardest reckonings is realizing that settling is never something done to you. It’s something you quietly agree to…out of fear, comfort, impatience, or…
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You Are Enough—Even While You’re Still Growing
Read more: You Are Enough—Even While You’re Still GrowingThere have been seasons when I looked around and felt like everyone else was racing ahead while I stood still, wondering if my pace meant I was falling short. It’s an uneasy feeling, the quiet pressure to be further along, to have more to show for the time that’s passed. But, there’s a quiet strength…
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Manchild Syndrome: How Nurture, Not Nature, Keeps Men Dependent
Read more: Manchild Syndrome: How Nurture, Not Nature, Keeps Men DependentAdulthood is supposed to mark the point where independence and responsibility become the norm, yet not everyone makes that leap. Some men cling to adolescence well into their adult years, relying on their partners to carry the emotional, mental, and practical weight of daily life. Maybe you’ve seen it firsthand: What can look like harmless…
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How to Learn R, Python, SQL, and SAS in a Few Months (Without Losing Your Mind)
Read more: How to Learn R, Python, SQL, and SAS in a Few Months (Without Losing Your Mind)Why Learning These Tools Matters Before you even open RStudio or install Python, it’s fair to ask: Why should I care? The short answer: data runs the world. Whether it’s healthcare, tech, government, or business, data drives decisions every single day. If you don’t understand the tools that shape that data, you’re stuck on the…
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If Caring Makes You a Simp, We Need More of Them
Read more: If Caring Makes You a Simp, We Need More of ThemThe word simp isn’t new. It dates back almost a century. It first appeared in the early 1900s as shorthand for “simpleton,” describing someone seen as foolish or naive. Over time, especially in hip-hop and online culture, the meaning shifted. By the late 20th century, simp was being used to mock men who were perceived…
Lence in Layers 